To be or not to be?

It's so exciting...little Isaac moves all of the time...Mike can even feel him every once in a while! It's still hard to wrap my mind around the fact that there is a baby in there. We haven't even started getting baby stuff yet. It's like one part of my mind knows & the other part is too scared to get my hopes up...does this make sense to anyone? I think I've become a pessimist over the years...quite the opposite from the extreme optimism I used to have. I guess that, in my mind, if something can go wrong, it will. I'm just afraid of disappointment. I can't fully appreciate & look forward to this little miracle until he's in my arms. Nevertheless...I'm still preparing myself. I'm reading about him everyday, trying to soak up as much information as I can to prepare myself for motherhood.