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Sunday, May 22, 2011

Pieces of my Soul are strung from childhood to young adulthood

I often have dreams that take me back to three different points in my life. One is my childhood in Arkansas where I was abused, abandoned by my only blood relative to backwards rural pedophiles. According to the book I'm currently reading, The Three Only Things by Robert Moss, this could account for soul-loss. If you experienced a traumatic event, a piece of your soul could remain in that place where the trauma occurred. I am often back in that trailor park, that back bedroom, that top bunk, that bus stop, walking in that neighborhood. It's never a pleasant dream. The second place is with my mom and stepdad when I found her and moved back in with her after having been abandoned by her for six torturous years from ages 7-14. I lived with them from ages 14-18. I'm often living with them again, trying to break free, having no freedom, no choices, no place or means to get away from them. These dreams are always very tumultuous. The third common place my dream self dwells is in Ohio at the home of my ex-fiancee's parents where I lived for 8 months while he was overseas in Japan and Korea. For the first time I was in a home with two loving parents who doted on me, cared for me and were there to lean on when I needed to lean. I'm often trying to get back to that house, but I am not welcome there. After the relationship ended, they had to stick by their son and that meant cutting ties with me. I've never fully recovered from the loss of those two people I had grown to love so much as if they were my own parents. According to this book, you can recover those lost parts of your soul. I am so interested to find out how!
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